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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”
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* S2 [1 x% C* R2 L* N2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”* q. E- }, E/ K, u* F
8 M8 o! A( S* n7 [( m+ Q: M男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”9 D$ F4 V# y0 k) w
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3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。' m! U2 u( v: Y5 |5 w+ C! v' b
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老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。
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女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。
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; k) P0 V$ {: e3 A1 ?$ O' X P2 r% I笑死我了。。。& W! t; u P$ W+ N( ^* W, F& s
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4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，" P5 i7 h( f- p9 ?. O; K* ? ~
& c f& C+ J! }! I可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，
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1 K: ^1 \) \' Q3 `我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!
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她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!
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晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”
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恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，
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5 ]" X! X# x+ F5 ~& H2 `4 z就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”
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: H( V) S* r+ A# X$ i' g" ^) O& u孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…, D F+ l% c& s, V. p, s) `8 l0 C, }1 m) n
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5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，. S: B6 n! N0 b
( k$ @6 L, s6 a( `我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！0 [4 z9 Q+ q3 ?) p2 P" R
q! ?+ h% f; j一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。4 H2 C9 C+ P9 I; i; u4 M0 k1 q
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当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？4 x) e' \9 f0 Q+ J# `' _0 }1 _+ g
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我，无业闲人一个。
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女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？
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( L2 e, d! W' t( E9 G3 y1 O; `' h我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。
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2 C8 F8 ]) T$ U9 U- t. t- k- l女：滚她妈犊子，滚…
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当前离线
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